Ghosts

Have you ever thought something was done and over with and out of somewhere unexpected a memory shows it's face? It can take control of your every thought at this point, like a living breathing organism that infiltrates your very being, like a virus. I was getting along ok. Not great, but I was ok. I tried to take a stride, and boom I was smacked in the head and knocked 2 feet back. My head knows it's over. My heart is struggling to catch up. I guess rushing it didn't help. I just want it to either break completely to where I can't feel a damn thing, or to get over it. Limbo is where I do not want to be. Hell, I feel silly at times for hurting over it. SILLY. Logic tells me I am being silly, but once again....I miss him. Songs remind me of him, traffic reminds me, FOOD reminds me, it's fucking crazy. Literally...crazy. I could probably write about him for hours. I won't, but I definitely could. I miss being able to sit in silence, and be content, we didn't have to talk, we knew what the other was thinking half the time anyways. Yes, it was a difficult relationship, he was difficult, but there was something in his eyes that made it all worth it. I keep hearing, "Yeah, I'm DEFINITELY dating the right girl for me." I'm sure he doesn't remember even saying it, but that's the memory that keeps haunting me. I thought he was too. Walking away from him was like leaving pieces of myself behind. Do you believe in fate?, he asked me. Yes, but I never thought THIS was my fate.